Starting Over

Liam playing with Bibi. ;-)

We've been in Miami for a little over a week now. We've been settling in nicely and I'm really happy with our decision to move back home. But I often get mini panic attacks throughout the day when I think about 'starting over.' We built a life in Denver. We purchased a home, filled it with furniture and memories, raised our boy for the first year of his life. And now...we're living in my grandmother's house, the house I grew up in. We sold or gave away 85.2% of our stuff including my car, all our furniture, some baby toys I was hoping to hold on to, awesome vacuum, Alex's father's day grill, my bike, etc etc. I get anxiety thinking about the day we move into our own place and having to spend so much money to make it comfortable. Don't get me wrong. We are so blessed! We live rent-free in a great house (with a pool!) and my grandmother cooks everyday. I don't even really have to clean, except for cleaning up after the baby. I'm no dummy. I know we have it good. But it is still difficult to give up our sense of autonomy. It's difficult to not have much that is truly ours. I know it's just stuff and I need to get over it. I know God will provide. He always has and always will. I guess I just feel a sense of urgency for some reason. We can be so impatient, wanting things on our own timeline, but God will work it all out in His perfect timing. In the mean time I will do my best to enjoy this time we have with my grandmother, this time we will never get back.